Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Signs of the apocalypse (continued)

The Hill gets e-mail:

President Bush:
Final 7 years will begin this year!

President Bush has said that he believes the final seven years to the Battle of Armageddon will begin yet this year!
He didn’t say it in exactly those words. What he said was that he believed a final peace agreement between Israel and the Palestinians would be concluded before the end of this year.
The Bible says, when this happens, the final seven years to Armageddon and to the Second Coming of Jesus will begin.

We learn that there are four (count 'em, four!) prophecies converging right now: "Two Billion To Die", "Mark Of The Beast", "The Antichrist To Come From Reborn Holy Roman Empire" (wait a minute, wasn't that supposed to be Obama's gig?) and "Mideast Peace - A Prophecy With A Date On It".

But of course, there's a catch:

The four above prophecies are so important that we have produced a special DVD explaining each one of them. We have put them together as our 2008 Prophecy Package. Normally these four DVDs would be offered for $20 each. If you get all four, you many receive them for your gift of $65.

I have no idea what use this guy thinks those $65 checks are going to be after the Apocalypse wipes out the world banking system (which I understand is controlled by Satan, anyway). Maybe there's a verse about your bank account getting raptured along with you that I missed...