Storytime

(H/T to Dave for this one. Original meme from here. I tweaked it a little bit, but that's what memes are for. Anyone who figures out what I'm up to is welcome to have a go at this.)

The Cosmic Cat was out walking in search of a good buzz, out where the buses don't run, along a dirt road where strands of corrente wire fence marked off the field lines. He knocked on the door of a weathered old farmhouse back off the road, in hopes that his buddy the Farmer might be growing something righteous out back.

The Farmer answered the door. "Well, if it isn't the ol' Cosmic Cat himself! Seems like I haven't seen you since Jesus left Chicago!"

"Tough to get out here since the car broke down. What's goin' on, Farmer?"

"Nothin' much, just another day around the ol' patch. Whatcha up to, Cat?"

"Oh, just out musing and meandering, y'know, anything rather than working. Got anything good?"

"Nope, the drought pretty much killed everything around here."

"I know what you mean, man. It's been tough findin' anything in town. Last night I wound up snortin' 24 crayons."

"Crayons?!?" The Farmer shook his head. "Man, that ain't my idea of findin' utopia."

"It wasn't so bad. Ran 'em through the mixter first. A little harsh, but I copped a little buzz."

"Whatever. Anything towards the pursuit of happiness, I suppose. Ya see the news this morning?"

"Naw, I had a wicked headache from the damn crayons. Last thing I remember on the tube, they were talkin' about somethin' called Holland's Comet."

"That's Hailley's Comet, you doofus. Anyway, they were talking about illegal wiretaps, data mining, all kinda scary stuff. We're losing our freedoms, y'know."

"I don't worry about none of that crap. You always were a perfect neurotic."

"Y'know, Cat, you oughta pick up a newspaper and read it once in a while, instead of spending all your time playin' with your teeny manolo."

"Hey, that's the other white meat there, buddy. Stop talkin' like a horse's ass."

"OK, OK. Seriously, you need to spend more time watching those we chose. Tell ya what. Why don't ya stay for dinner? We roasted this big ol' red hog on the spit out back over the weekend, an' we got plenty of leftovers."

"Naw, I'm gonna hike my way back into town. If I'm not too late I'll try to catch the Bible study for atheists down at the megachurch tonight."

"Bible study? You goin' Christianist or somethin'?"

"Naw, I just figure that if what everybody's sayin' is true, I better learn to start prayin', cause our government's sellin' us down the river."

"Welcome to the revolution, brother."